FireGrandmaster wrote: ↑1 month agoEver wanted to type sth here and then realized you have been autocorrected?
Thank you for your feedback about the word censor. Please understand that it exists to help reduce some of the harsher language, such as explicit curse words and very sexual-centered (mostly BDSM) language. Maintaining a mostly
PG environment is important to maintaining the social comfort of all.
It does also censor some known harmful links that share misinformation, sketchy retailer links of fly by night pop-ups, adult-site and BDSM shop links, and general spam. Personally, I’m a bit fed up with the pressured consumerism in our community, and I think it’s unfair the community has to deal with so much explicit link spam to BDSM goods, xxx/x-rated content, and incorrect “guides”.
I understand the frustration of having a word minimized, and I agree that it can become too censored if not monitored, but you must realize that foul or explicit language is just not necessary here. It bothers many of our users to stumble upon posts that are explicit. Using softer language or rearranging wording to reduce disruption and discomfort is being kind to others that share this space. The word censor often does this for us, and sometimes in ways that can lighten the mood enough so that a post doesn’t come off as “scary” or too intense. snailpoops and giggles!
Anyway, if there are intimate, bedroom-related details you need to discuss with a potential partner then those details likely don’t need to be publicly shared. It’s best that information is exchanged personally in case there are questions and do that you have the opportunity to clear up any misunderstanding that may occur.
FireGrandmaster wrote: ↑1 month agoAnd the questions in the form for Littles are really weird. Name something you recently learned - everyone who has a job be like (something you wouldn't even understand unless you do similar job).
In regards to the personal ads forms, mundane questions exist there in effort to help start conversation between two+ interested persons. None of the questions should be too difficult to answer with a sentence or less.
As a very simple, quick example of answering this question, I recently learned the pronunciation of the name “Ami” is not the same as “Amy”, even in America. That has nothing to do with having or not having a job, but is something that could help strike up a short conversation. It’s very relatable.
My partners posted a personals ad once. They answered a very plain question about their favorite movies. One of our first, initial conversations was about Wall-E because of that. We had a fun little blip of conversation about it. It made it easier to reach out to them since we liked the same movie. Years later, we still occasionally talk about Wall-E and how we wish it was more popular. Simple questions can help bond people.
FireGrandmaster wrote: ↑1 month ago…make questions in the Littles form more accurate.
Littles are people, not one-dimensional characters. Littles are adults, not stunted children. Littles should absolutely bond in a relationship deeper than roleplay or regressive expressions. A long, happy relationship will require a little to both mentally and emotionally invest as an adult. If a Little refuses to have conversation outside of their regressive interests then they aren’t going to carry on a successful serious relationship. That’s just how bonds work.
When it comes to our CGL identities and relationships ideals then it’s best we have one-on-one conversation about many of these more personal points. There is a lot of variation, and a lot of broad assumptions can be made if we’re not actually conversing with one another. For example, see this simple guide
and this simple guide
about questions to ask a potential partner who is a Caregiver or Little. Unfortunately, these questions must be discussed because there isn’t another way to just know where other people fit in the community and their set of beliefs since there are so many lies spread and encouraged. You can touch on some of that on a generic form but it isn’t the same as having a quick conversation about it and being able to gauge the other person’s understanding.
I know it’s difficult to understand that all of this extends to your non-Little identity too. It is genuinely important to realize though. Your partner really needs to know you in all ways, which must include your non-regressive interests, behaviors, preferences, capabilities, and choices too. The bond must be deeply established in this community if you want it to transition to real life and not just online, roleplay, or scenes.
As a Caregiver myself, I can’t tell you how absolutely boring it is to read about a Little’s favorite color. Most recite the exact same thing, as if it were some rule to say your favorite color, that you like to color in coloring books, and that you have a favorite stuffed animal. These generic statements aren’t creating a bond, and are very barely personal details within the community. Now, once a bond is established then I know what kind of coloring books my partner prefers (and what I like to see them color), I know they only wear their favorite color so it’s pretty important after all, and know that if they don’t have their favorite stuffed animal at night they feel like they’ve done something bad and wrong to it. I would not know about the depths of these points, and more truthfully would not care so much, without the bond we worked to create outside of their regressive traits. You can’t expect a Caregiver to truly and deeply care about you from reading 3 watered down statements about your favorite color. You can’t expect a Caregiver to want to please you, take care of you, and give their focus to you by just saying you’re a Little.
FireGrandmaster wrote: ↑1 month ago
I know that this site is different. It’s intentional. We’re not here to use others, to live in fantasy roleplay, or to further spread convenient mistruths to falsely uplift ourselves or inflate our egos. It’s just different. If you don’t want to be here then that’s okay too, we understand not everyone wants to be here.