Caregivers, Mommies, Daddies, adult babies, middles, babyfur, diaperfur, and all other Bigs and littles discuss regression, relationship dynamics, have open group conversation, share experienced advice, and exchange ideas to help one another grow in knowledge.
Note: Personal ads are NOT permitted.
Forum rules: This section of the site is for open, group conversation and public discussion topics within the community.
► Show more details
  • User avatar
  • User avatar
so i kind of(?) have a caregiver/babysitter and they said they like me (romantically) but we're not in a relationship yet and recently i joined a a chat site server where they had been in for a long time and they have all their friends there and they said they didn't want me talking much in the server because they felt uncomfy with it? apparently they said it's bc of potential drama (as their ex had caused drama for them and their friends) but i know i wouldn't ever try to cause them any problems and i hardly interacted in the server in the first place. i just wanted to talk a bit and maybe make friends but they said they don't want me to talk in there when it was them who wanted me to join the server in the first place. so now i can't help but feel kind of upset because i felt good talking in the server and usually i get too shy talking in big servers. i don't want to make them upset or uncomfy but at the same time i feel sad that they're not letting me at least talk a bit in the server even to people that might not be their friend or might not know them. i obviously understand what had happened with their ex and the stress that might have caused but i know i wouldn't try to cause any drama for them and their friends, in fact even the idea of it seems absurd to me as i hate causing problems myself.
it isn't so much a problem as i rarely spoke in the server, only when relevant conversation came up, but it makes me feel like they don't actually want to be with me seeing as they say they like me romantically but don't want to share it. maybe it's just a sense of jealousy talking but at the same time it does make me feel upset that they're showing themselves as to be single and searching when they clearly said they want to be with me and care for me.
umm does it seem wrong that im getting upset over this?
It sounds like there isn’t a solid commitment between you two just yet and that could be playing a factor in them not wanting to have you fully integrate with their friend group just yet. They may have started to bring you in as their somebody but then realized they were jumping the gun a little and tried to back-pedal by basically asking you to wait. They may have just suddenly realized how badly it could go again and would rather build with you more as to avoid potential embarrassment in front of their friends if things don’t quite work out/progress with you. It could be really embarrassing to bring someone into your friend group as a potential partner that you’re all excited about but then have to announce “nevermind” a few days after or something, you know?

So, I don’t feel this is a red flag or warning sign. I think this person suddenly felt a little scared that they’d be embarrassed after they realized they may be rushing a part of a new potential relationship. It happens.

I’d give it some time, continue focusing on building a strong relationship with this person, and maybe in a couple of months after you two decide to commit try to gently bring up wanting to better meet their online friends group. Let them see over time how much they can trust you. I’m sure they’ll feel more comfortable with time.

Enjoy your path :hugs:

paw patrol, T.O.T.S., lilo and stitch: the series,[…]

Favorite toys when regressed?

plushies, rattles, and action figures! i also like[…]

I myself like to sleep or watch tv a Mommy/Daddy t[…]

Dealing with disappointment

Well be happy you have one you can meet I myself j[…]