Caregivers, Mommies, Daddies, adult babies, middles, babyfur, diaperfur, and all other Bigs and littles discuss regression, relationship dynamics, have open group conversation, share experienced advice, and exchange ideas to help one another grow in knowledge.
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#56267
I’ve been with a guy for over a year. We met on that one BDSM community website. I’ve always been open about being little. I regress infrequently during the beginning of relationships because I need to be comfortable. Well I started regressing more. And he started acting uncomfortable. I have tried talking to my partner many times and the conversation goes no where. I’m finding myself hiding my regressions or almost forcing a regression not to happen.
My biggest problem is, he’ll refer to himself as Daddy and me as Little Girl when he wants anything sexual... but he doesn’t support or even interact with my little any other time. It’s hard not to be offended and sad.
I guess I’m just venting... but its hard to hide a piece of me when I thought I finally found someone to share that piece with.... :tears: :tears:
#56270
This is definitely really hard to have to experience. I know exactly what you mean. The thing to realize, that you can use as a tool for yourself even, is that CGL, being a Little or being a Caregiver is actually not BDSM. That’s going to help a lot because you can search at better places for a partner, if it comes to a break up, or use this awareness to help figure out if what you’re talking about is what the other person is talking about.

There’s the misconception that CGL is a branch of BDSM because they’ve come to use similar terms; although, these terms often mean different things in each community. BDSM is a sexual interest though. It’s what some does and is strictly sexual, really. Even the acronym is purely sexual. Being a Little is a personality type, which can bleed into sexuality but isn’t strictly so. It’s who someone is by personality—how they perceive, react, and interact with others and their environment. So, a Little can also be involved in BDSM but it often isn’t that way. But someone who likes to RP scenes in the BDSM realm of mock abuse or incest isn’t necessarily a Little. There are two completely separate things. We are two completely separate communities. Maybe you’re a part of both groups but your regression isn’t, and that’s very valid too.

You can start by trying to educate your partner about this separation and see if you can also get him to understand that being a Little isn’t some twisty play you’re putting on, and that it’s degrading in the unhappy way to have it used as if it is something to only be sexualized. You could encourage him to join sites like this so that he can read more and try to understand who you are. Ultimately, if you want this relationship to survive you’re going to have to talk a lot about this. It’s okay to talk about it though. It’s who you are. You should be passionate about it!

If it helps, I’ve replied to a post right here that may help clear this all up. There are a few posts there so it gets lengthy but maybe it’s help you find some words your partner can understand when educating him.

I’m really sorry you’re going through this right now. I really believe things will get better for you, regardless of the outcome of this relationship. Use what you know as a tool to make your life easier and everything is going to work out right.

Enjoy your path :hugs:

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