Caregivers, Mommies, Daddies, adult babies, middles, babyfur, diaperfur, and all other Bigs and littles discuss regression, relationship dynamics, have open group conversation, share experienced advice, and exchange ideas to help one another grow in knowledge. (Age 18 or older only permitted)
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#55000
hi idk ifs dis is allowed but its been bothering me for quit a wiles and its making me question what type of little i am im intoDDLG however i dont do kink stuff. i have a daddie i am a little wile in little space we dont do adult stuff i am simply in little space i love pacies coloring sippys ect he doesnt do any "kink" stuff towards me wile in little space so my question is what does this mean? cuz it bothers me a lot when ppl say ddlg is a kink or when i tell them im ddlg they get all weird towards me ;-; and i feel unwanted and unliked by other littles is there anyone that is in the same position or feel the same way? :tears: :>.<: i would likesome advice plz
#55003
Hey, so I like a bit of dominance in my daddies too. I like to be little when I'm little and I don't like to be pulled out of that mindset while I'm in one of my roles. But when I'm outside of that little space, I do enjoy certain kinks like being pinned down or just subtle things like having their hand on the back of my neck. But I don't see why anyone in the community should be treating you any differently for it. If you're strictly little when you're in little space, first of all there's nothing wrong with that, but I don't see how that make you different from most other littles, or at least how I see it is like this, It's like you step into the scene and that's it... You're you, you're little, end of story. I see it as anything you do, any dom/sub activities that you're into are your business and that no one has any right to judge or try to shame you for it. I believe that so long as it's consentual, safe and no one is getting hurt, then you do you. I can understand being an unconcenting witness to certain things, I know that there is a lot to bdsm that can make people VERY uncomfortable especially when they DON'T understand what is going on. It'd be like randomly walking into a board meeting at work and suddenly finding some of your co workers in some rather compromising positions right in the middle of it. If you're not expecting that and don't wish to be party to it, I can see wanting to draw some boundaries there. Liek maybe asking to keep things pg in the workplace which I find is usually a rule in most workplaces anyways, but you see my point. I can see maybe laying a few ground rules, keeping things pg in the playroom. If you'll agree to it then I don't see there being anything more to the discussion, what you do in the bedroom is your business, and especially in a community like this there is a definite need for members to be a little more open minded than most. I can't say for certain what kind of little you are, in fact I've been struggling to identify what type of little I am as well. But I'm more of a mixed basket of things so it's a little more complicated, but as long as you're happy with your lifestyle I don't see why you should change it. I can only suggest maybe a change of group or venue to one that's a little more open minded, or just reassuring them that you don't like to cross wires while you're in your little role. I don't really have a problem if my care giver wants to be a little more dominant while I'm still being little, I find that I really don't mind mixing it up from time to time, but it's more 6 times out of ten I'd just like to be left in the little space that I'm in. So I'm open to more of the dominance aspect in my play, but it doesn't completely define me ore my relationships either. In certain venues and groups I can get with some PDA for sure, but I don't know the protocol for this, but I just like to make sure that the people I'm hanging around with are okay with it too, even if it's not their kink, but so long as I'm not accidentally giving someone an eyeful of something they really weren't expecting to see. So no I don't go to the grocery store and crawl around half naked or in a diaper, but I will wear a super hero t-shirt and have my hair up in pigtails and call my partner 'daddy' or something of the like. Keep in mind though, either maybe I don't look my age, paired with the fact I like older partners, or people just don't care but I've rarely been questioned on my behaviour in public and I've actually never??? really had a problem, the occasional comment from someone that I actually know, but wasn't on good terms with to begin with so I could care less. But generally the only reaction I get is a few amused glances my way when I'm chasing my partner down and aisle with a stuffie and saying "daddy please! it's sooo fluffy!!!" But you never really know, I just try to read the room and keep it within reason and no one seems to have much problem with it. But I also don't put up with blatent discrimination or abuse so I'm not about to back down and I can be VERY resourceful and blantently overprotective too. So if I catch any of that crap happening while I'm out, I'll make sure they know better for next time, cause while I may be shy around my cg's I certainly have no issue standing up, getting LOUD AND making a scene of things when I know someone is very clearly in the wrong of it. You be you, keep safe, and don't let anyone put you down for just being you :yes:
#55006
Some community misconceptions have, unfortunately, perpetuated due to the lack of defined separation within existing groups (defining clearly different groups such as BDSM/kink, diaper fetishists, regression,...), an overlap in word usage (such as “Daddy” in BDSM and “Daddy” in regression/CGL partnerships), and “resource” material that primarily focuses on becoming popular instead of providing education (sometimes the truth is not always popular). It takes a lot of work from each of us to create better educational material, make community contributions that share our knowledge and resources, and that boldly make corrections to others and materials that spread inaccuracies.

There is nothing wrong with not involving sexual situations in your regression. You are still a little—no additional term required because you just are who you are. You don’t need to be twisty to experience regression or for your partner to take care of you. Caregiver/little (CGL) partnerships aren’t inherently sexual.

It can definitely be frustrating to have accusations made about you based on misconceptions. It’s something that you will have to learn to look past, provide educational materials about, and not focus on once you’ve educated. There’s no need to argue or try to validate yourself to someone who strongly disagrees or refuses education. You and your partner both understand and there are times where only that is necessary.

So, I really want to reference our educational articles for this situation to help you understand that what you’ve described is absolutely normal:

★ CGL partnerships, Age Regression, Littles, Middles, Caregivers, Adult Babies, and other identities that fall into our community are not inherently sexual or related to BDSM.
☆ CGL community members may individually also perform acts of or experience BDSM in it's various forms.
☆ A member of the CGL community can also be a member of the BDSM community. A member of the CGL community is not always a member of the BDSM community.

★ There is a sexual kink and/or sexual adult interest for roleplaying as a parent (commonly "Daddy" for "Daddy kink") or as a child or teenager. This is not the same as being a little, being a true caregiver, or engaging in a CGL relationship.
☆ People participating in those acts are doing so for sexual intention and gratification. Those adult interests and kinks may be BDSM-related.
The CGL community is not inherently based on sexual experiences, desires, or fantasies.

☆ CGL does not require a person to be sexual or experience sexual activities while regressed or with a regressed partner.
☆ CGL is not necessarily BDSM unless it involves sexual motivation, gratification, or intention. An example of BDSM CGL would be a little who regresses during foreplay to further entice and arouse their partner.

BDSM is an umbrella term that correlates to sexual activity. If no sexual activity exists or is perceived to be unrelated to other components of a relationship between or more people then it is not truly BDSM.

★ We accept that a CGL relationship may involve BDSM components, such as powerplay (sexual play based upon a power exchange such as Dominance/submission).
☆ CGL community members may individually also perform acts of or experience BDSM in it's various forms.
☆ A member of the CGL community can also be a member of the BDSM community. A member of the CGL community is not always a member of the BDSM community.

★ Just like any other adult-bodied individual, a little may have sexual needs and interests. Littles (and their caregivers) are not necessarily sexual or nonsexual.
☆ A person who experiences regression but also engages in sexual gratification is not necessarily performing an act of BDSM unless their regression was directly a component of the sexual intention (such as the reason for arousal).
Being a little, being a caregiver, regression, or feeling regressed is not inherently kink or adult interest.
From our Baseline Facts resource.

I hope that helps some with your journey, and if you find yourself wanting to provide a resource to educate another.
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