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So, I have a bit of an issue. Not huge, but still there. I feel really awkward when my boyfriend tries to be my caregiver. Even with simple things, like just calling me kitten or princess, it feels so weird coming out of his mouth. Like I have a physical reaction to it, and not a good one. It's just plain weird. I love him to bits, and I really want him to be the caregiver I want, but every time he tries it kinda throws me out if little space cause it's so weird to me.
Now, we are new to this, we've dated for almost 7 years without this dynamic in place. So, it's possible that I'm just not used to it. This is all new territory for us, and trying to shift from constantly thinking like a big person to allowing myself to feel little is a hard transition, it still feels like I should be ashamed or something, like I'm doing something wrong. So we've got that working against us. Also, we don't live together at the moment, and probably won't be for a while. We get to spend time together about once every other week, and I have no other opportunities to be little except when I'm with him. I feel like it's kinda this perfect storm of things working against us at the moment.
Have others gone through a weird transition phase with this dynamic, or did you just fall into it perfectly? If love to hear how others handle their relationships! Also if you have nothing to offer but encouraging words, that helps too. I can use all you have. :pheart:
Good Evening :)
Do you think it's feeling awkward because its forced? Maybe subconsciously or not. Obviously you're used to each other and love each other after 7 years but this is such a big adjustment. If nicknames wern't a big thing in your relationship before, is your partner just using them because he feels like he has to? That could be making it a bit awkward.
Overall I don't think its a big issue because of the fact you've been together so long already it's obvious you work being together. I'm sure you guys are not the only ones who get stuck in this transition phase. :splode:
I hadn't thought of that, I hadn't thought to ask him, haha. That could be! He's not exactly a gentle, nurturing person naturally, so it's possible that he's just kinda doing what he thinks he needs to do.
I wasn't overly concerned about it, but it was kinda frustrating when it happened. I'll talk to him about it more and see if we can smooth anything out. :pinkh:
I've had this issue before with one of my exs

We didn't really fall into it perfectly either

It takes sometime adjusting and even then there maybe a few changes needed to be done for you to feel comfortable being in little space around him

I think its natural to feel this way at first and would suggest talking to him on things you might hope for in the cgl aspect of your relationship

remind him though that it isnt his fault you are feeling this way and that you would love for him to be your daddy but at the same time make a small list of things you might want when you are in little space, however its best not to be vague about what you want and provide a actual list of things you wish to have

just like how caregivers give you rules sometimes, sometimes littles need to put up their own list of dos and donts themselves

and sorry that this reply is super late- but I just felt like commenting and giving my own opinion on this ^^;
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