EricFuller wrote: ↑1 month ago
I have to respectfully disagree with the "dom" part not actually meaning dominant anymore.
Domination, by definition, means to exercise control over. What you describe is classic BDSM style scene control. You do not describe a viable, long-term relationship structure that exchanges respect while also nurturing
a partner’s childlike qualities in a way that, ultimately, provides them with ongoing reassurance and stability.
An import keyword here for an adult with a childlike personality is nurture
—not domination, not control. Regressors desire to be treated as children to some degrees, and domination isn’t something a good parent does to a child they care about.
A good parent does not “control” their child. They help their child to be respectful of others and learn to behave appropriately based on the environment immediately around them. A parent tries to control outside harms. A parent tries to control which situations their child must face. The parent works to control themselves to exercise patience for their child and to prove as a role model. A parent does not control a child. Children are not puppets, toys, or pets that are mindlessly manipulated or dominated to submit to the will of their parents.
Regressors don’t need or want to “submit”. Regressors want to be like children. They are
childlike in various ways. They want to be nurtured
as children. They don’t want Daddy to dominate and control them, they don’t want to be restricted into having no consciousness or capabilities of their own, they want Daddy to care for them as a parent cares for a child. They want Daddy to see that they still have growing to do in similar ways of that of a biological child. They aren’t incapable, they just need reassurance and to be nurtured
Littles do not need to be controlled, just as children do not need to be controlled. Yes, there is guidance involved but there is no black-and-white structure involved where the Caregiver truly gets all say while the Little willingly, blindly ignores their own desires, thoughts, opinions, and feelings. Even children value being consulted, being able to feel freedom of choice, and receiving praise for decisions they made with and without assistance.
Yes, there are situations where the Little wants the Caregiver to ultimately make the decision, but there also plenty of times where the Little does not. Most Littles wish their Caregiver would simply make the decision they, themselves, would make—proving they are
capable and reassuring the close bond they share with their partner despite feeling a lack of personal confidence as an adult. This is why Littles wish certain desires that are typically parent-only decisions to be made. Take for example a simple argument of “bottle feeding versus breastfeeding” for a Little with a very young regressive age. Even then they have an opinion, even perhaps a desire, that they are hopeful their Caregiver-to-be automatically agrees with and equally desires. The closer their Caregiver-to-be aligns with the choices they already have chosen for themselves the more interested they are to pursue a relationship. It isn’t so much that they don’t want to make decisions, it’s that they want their partner to agree and provide underlying reassurance that they are
capable. Being an adult has simply shaken their confidence, but they are very capable.
Not all Littles want to be locked under the unrelenting control of a Caregiver, truly stripped of all capabilities above an approximated regressed age, and punished for making judgements that are ultimately better or at least of equal value to the situation presented. In all truth, I don’t believe most Littles honestly could live in such a state where they have absolutely no voice. That isn’t being treated as a child, that’s being treated as an object. Even children have valuable opinions and perspectives. Even children “get their way” well after a parent has initially said no. It’s just a part of that type of care and nurturing
of that type of person.
In all truth, we know that majority of the punishments inflicted toward a Little is a part of a scene. A scene is exaggerated and acted out. After all, most parents do not resort to even spanking for trivial disobedience such as sneaking a cookie or staying up 20 minutes past bedtime. Scenes of punishments for Littles are often related to sexual desires (bleeding over into BDSM interests) or stress-relief (psychologically documented that many animals, including humans, seek out or inflict physical harm to themselves for the endorphin reaction that results in endocrine exhaustion).
Children who are overly punished or have their opinions constantly ignored become fearful. They lose confidence. They become resentful of their parents. They feel unvalued, unloved. None of these things are things Littles desire to be replicated.
Most Littles in a typical, everyday state do not seek punishment from their Caregiver. Most do not seek to be intentionally defiant as to cause genuine distress of their Caregiver. A child is punished for doing something of defiance, intentionally causing distress or harm. A child cries because they don’t like, and did not want, punishment, and often because they are remorseful for causing unhappiness of their parent. If a Little is behaving often as a child then they aren’t seeking punishment nearly as often as BDSM roleplay scenes would make it seem. Periodically, maybe, but as a typical daily or weekly occurrence outside of sexual motivation (a BDSM “scene”) or as a form of self-harm (“stress relief”) is not very common at all.
I would argue that most Littles want to be nurtured
. They want to be cared for and grown, to have development into a stage that no longer feels bizarre, pressured, and generally uncomfortable. Being dominated, controlled, and punished can be fun for BDSM scenes for a Little, but it’s uncommon that it’s the life they desire to be carried out without end.
EricFuller wrote: ↑1 month ago
This particular art is full of love, respect, stories, giving, taking, cuddles, pleasure and just the right amount of pain. Which all work together to allow a princess to completely give control over to her Dom Daddy...
Learning what makes someone feel loved, cherished, and fulfilled does not mean you get to control them. Not only accepting but doing acts, such as cuddling, to appear to appreciate someone’s different type of personality in effort to gain control over them is wrong. You only control a person who wants to be controlled, and that truly has nothing to do with displays of affection. People very rarely seek to be controlled by another person in long-term commitments and it rarely occurs outside of “scenes” in healthy romantic partnerships.
In a way, it’s kind of sickening to think that showing care for a person means they will let you control them. It isn’t control you’ve been given. You were given respect and love. Trust placed in you isn’t giving up control. Being loved isn’t being able to control the person who has fallen in love with you. That just isn’t the ability to control. That’s respect. That’s that person taking your feelings into account. That’s that person thinking of you and your needs too. That’s not domination and submission. That’s love.