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Sharing advice on how to seek, manage, and maintain a relationship that includes CGL identities.
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PowderPuffPrincess wrote: 1 year ago Struggling to find anywhere. DateCGL doesn't allow non-physically intimate accounts and everyone on that one fet community website seems to want physically intimate connections too
DateCGL absolutely does allow searches for relationship structures that do not include physically intimate intimacy. physically intimate interaction does not define or identify romance and romantic commitments. I believe most people these days are aware that sex is not required in a relationship, and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to fill out a dating profile and indicate you have no desire or intention to engage sexually with your to-be partner.

Also, just in case there was any sort of added on curiosity, asexual and nonsexual identifying persons are also welcome to utilize that dating platform of DateCGL.

We do not promote or approve of “friends with emotional benefits” or “babysitters” (aka “littlesitters”) in the community. It causes emotional distress and damage over time. Pretending to love someone or pretending to be loved by someone just isn’t healthy to train your mind to do.

We will not link to other potential dating or partnering websites outside of DateCGL and/or PolyPatchwork. There are absolutely sites intended to prey upon and scam this niche community. We will not risk promoting platforms that take advantage or harm our community.

Lastly, there is more to all of this than partnering. Please don’t get so hung up on the idea that you “need” someone else to be or feel happy or content with yourself.

Moving this topic to the appropriate Relationship Advice forum category.
PowderPuffPrincess wrote: 1 year ago I don't want dating or romance, I want a platonic connection like family because I didn't have much of a biological one. I personally would not feel comfortable with a family member having romantic interest in me and that seems to exclude me from using the site cause it's a dating site.
We cannot help you with this thought.

A stranger on the internet will not replace your parents and cannot love you as a parent truly could. That’s a truth.

Adults do not become parents of adults in the same way they become parents of actual children. That’s a truth.

Motherly wrote: 1 year ago We do not promote or approve of “friends with emotional benefits” or “babysitters” (aka “littlesitters”) in the community. It causes emotional distress and damage over time. Pretending to love someone or pretending to be loved by someone just isn’t healthy to train your mind to do.
You may want to read up on caregiving itself:

The short of it is that, in the CGL community, caregiving is an act of love. It is a gift of love that an adult provides an experience and acceptance of nonnormative expressions of another adult through a unique, personal bond. Romantic love. Romantic love between adults. A deep love that isn’t shared among many others, if any other at all, and stems from a deep understanding of the regressor as an individual. While it may not appear conventional, it is special and of the heart when it is true and not done as an act or roleplay. This is important to come to terms with over time.

What you’re asking for is to be loved very deeply. To feel like you’re very special to someone. To feel loved, unconditionally. It’s okay to want that. Everyone wants to be loved. Adults love other adults in certain ways though because that is how our brains have developed to maintain certain social requirements.

If you’re just looking for roleplay that gives you moments of feeling cared for very deeply then there are sites and chat rooms for that. Most community sites not only accept roleplay but they are primarily based around it. A lot of people in the community are willing to roleplay online. It’s okay to just be looking for roleplay. It’s really okay, you don’t need to pretend it’s more than that. Just be honest with yourself and others you interact with as to avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

It sounds like you’re looking for more of a chosen family relationship than a cgl dynamic maybe? If that’s the case I’d say just get out there in the world (physically or online) and meet people who are interested in what you’re into and who you vibe with. No idea if there are places you can go for people specifically looking for family dynamics but I wouldn’t be surprised if they are.

I would however temper your expectations if you’re looking for someone to reparent you while you’re in littlespace. That’s asking a lot of someone - parenting a child requires a lot of selflessness and sacrifice and it’s generally not something you’re likely to find someone willing to engage in outside of roleplay scenarios.

I myself had wonderful chosen parents. I loved them very much and I miss them every day. But I related to them at my bio age. You absolutely can create a family for yourself. But it’s highly unlikely that you’ll find an adult friend who will treat you like their literal child outside of very specific and self-limiting scenarios.

It also can’t hurt to get out there and make other friends with an interest in cgl so you’ll know they’ll be accepting of that part of you.

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