[littlespace2014]

i was wondering if any other littles have a really hard time getting into their little/headspace? and if so how do you go into your littlespace and what helps you the most

[AzureAndVanilla]

Littlespace isn't some magical space where you "become" a child (mentally, emotionally). It also isn't "letting go".

In essence, Littlespace is a state of relaxation where a Little can more freely express themselves.

Entering Littlespace should be a natural occurrence to those who identify as Little. It isn't a very specific occurrence either — the setting doesn't have to be perfect to allow some degree of regression to be achieved. Bare in mind that regression is the amount of self-expression that one can comfortably carry out, and not how deeply one can fit into a role or a scene of a play.

We are not saying that there are not factors that impede this process, though. Growing up entails becoming aware of societal expectations and strapping on responsibilities to oneself and to those around us. With such come situations that require situational awareness and conformance. There can also be stressors, such as work being extra rough, not making ends meet, family emergencies.

Even so though, we believe that Littlespace isn't and shouldn't be out of reach. Because it isn't an on and off thing, and because one can't entirely shut out personality traits, it's always aaccessible in some form or another.

We think that the healthiest thing a Little can do when "having trouble entering Littlespace" is to rethink what regression is and to accept themselves. We say this because having personal unmet expectations can lead to grief and confusion, like "why can't I regress like any other Little?"

Now, a thing that helps most with relaxation is to recognize what situations you feel most relaxed being yourself in. If you're a social person, then allow yourself to be bright and bubbly with your friends. If you're a more quiet person, then set aside time to have privacy and comfort. Surround yourself with what makes YOU feel most comfortable and relax, and Regression should follow.

[admin]

Anyone else have trouble getting into character for the audition?

That's not what I meant though!

Right?

So, let's try again...

Anyone else have trouble relaxing enough (like, letting your guard down) to allow their regression to externalize more obviously so that they can sort-of get lost in those comfortable, self-affirming feelings for awhile?

That's what you meant, right?


Please do remember that being a little is a personality trait and not an act that you're putting on. You aren't a character in a play. You aren't playing a part in a scene. You are just you.

Regressive episodes are just more elaborate, external expressions of what is always present in the little. When you think of it like that then you can feel more validation for just being yourself, and it may help you to embrace the very small little things you do that are scattered throughout your everyday life. Appreciating your personality trait as something that is always present, regardless of the amount of expression, is important to understanding and loving yourself.

While you may absolutely be reducing and suppressing more deeper regressive episodes right now you are still yourself. Managing, and at times outright suppressing, your regression is something you've learned throughout your biological maturity and it has been absolutely necessary to your functional life, fitting in with peers, completing important tasks, and finding happiness in general expectations that have been placed on you as you've grown. It’s a necessary skill to have as a little. You learned to do this by watching others and mimicking what was acceptable and expected of you, what your parents pressured you to do in effort to "grow up", and from influence from peers you biologically matured with in social settings like school. A little is always a little though, and being a little means you are naturally regressive in some way(s).

Embrace what you can find about your daily interactions that you do more "little like" than other, non-regressive adults. Being a little is a personality--a core part of who you are as a person--and not something you "experience". A lot of times self-acceptance and personal understanding can lead to major stress reduction and the capability to externalize more of your thoughts and feelings since you will feel more calm and safe about who you are as an atypical adult. Sometimes you just need to relax and accept yourself so that you can recognize that you don't need to heavily suppress your regression right now, whenever right now is for you.

Remember that regression does not transform you into being a different person, it is not disassociative identity disorder or multiple personality disorder, and is a part of a person's whole being--not a separate set of knowledge or experiences that is turned on and off like a light switch. A little may feel like a child but there is no magical transformation, even mentally, that erases the memories, knowledge, and experiences they've gathered into adulthood. So, don't put yourself into expectations of becoming and think of this more as just expressing parts of yourself that you've been managing to keep reduced so that you socially fit in with other adults.

While you may want to get lost in your own simplistic thoughts, it's okay if you don't and it doesn't mean you don't have these more simple thoughts, actions, or feelings throughout every single day. Work on educating yourself about yourself and I really feel like you will just generally feel much more happier with what regressive traits you have sprinkled throughout your every day life.

[littlespace2014]

thank you very much this helps me to see things in a different way

[Sweetbottoms]

I find this thread very interesting. But I have a question about regression. I've noticed the word regression has been used in a negative unhealthy way. The only example I have is my daughter's therapist saying that if we don't keep up with therapy she will regress. I don't know if regression is a negative or positive thing. but according to what you're saying it's fine it's a positive thing.

I have my moments where I'm able to slip into my little self I'm starting to think that my little self is literally my inner child.
But you mention regression so perhaps I regress into my old childhood self I find this really confusing. Im new at this so please forgive me if I'm bubbly on like a goofball.
I think what I'm asking about this can your inner child be a little?

I don't mean to be confused it's just I feel like I need comfort I've been through a lot and I am resorting to childhood comfort mechanisms to help me manage my anxiety. the pacifier is doing wonders and I want to buy another one because I like it.
I want to buy some onesies to wear around the house but I don't want anyone knowing about my little. I feel like I have to keep it a secret cuz I'm afraid people will judge me harshly and more abused juice on the way.
Sometimes I'll talk a certain way like I'm five. I have a five-year-old so I can get away with it so part of my little can show without people knowing in some parts of my life

I would love to hear what you think

[admin]

I find this thread very interesting. But I have a question about regression. I've noticed the word regression has been used in a negative unhealthy way. The only example I have is my daughter's therapist saying that if we don't keep up with therapy she will regress. I don't know if regression is a negative or positive thing. but according to what you're saying it's fine it's a positive thing.

A biological child regressing is a different situation than an adult, who has fully developed throughout life stages. When we talk about regression in our community we are referring to a personality trait and not an impairment or challenge of cognition, development, or awareness. When a medical professional talks about being concern that a child is regressing they are referring to the potential the child has an intellectual challenge.

It is a medical concern for children when the word "regress" is being used because the child needs to continue developing within their expected biological bracket, and a child who is regressing may, unfortunately, fall too far behind and not "catch up", indicating further issues with their cognitive capabilities and leading one to believe they may be challenged when it comes to learning, socialization, or other important points in human development. It could be for a number of reasons--such as a challenge they were born to face, distress they have experienced, or lack of educational stimulation. It is concerning. They are referring to a medical condition and not a personality trait.

Your child's therapist should absolutely be monitoring his/her growth and development, and absolutely should be concerned if he/she regresses back to a stage and does not continue his/her development as necessary. A child should be encouraged to continue growth and development, and stagnation should be something medically treated so that the child can mature into a healthy, well-rounded adult who is capable of functioning and, hopefully, caring for themselves to the best of their potential capabilities.

My point is that it is very, very different than a fully developed adult experiencing regression as a personality trait. There is no cause for concern because a little is a biological adult and did develop throughout life stages, gained experiences, learned important life skills, and generally maintained their cognitive awareness equal to that of their biological peers. They can and do function well with their peers, but they display a more childlike personality. They are not psychologically regressing to where they are "stuck" at a former life stage and cannot move forward (which is the concern with a child regressing). They are experiencing regressive personality traits, not a psychological or mental capabilities disorder or impairment.

When a little experiences regression they are not forgetting their skills, knowledge, or capabilities as an adult. They are just an atypical personality, and are prone to experience a mood in which they want to display their personality trait more externally through mimicking displays of youthfulness. They continue to learn, continue to gain new skills, and continue to be able to interact with biological peers just as typically expected (albeit, perhaps with a bit unique quirkiness about them and their preferences).

When a child experiences regression they may lose skills or knowledge they once gained. They may not be able to cognitively move forward. They may have underlying medical issues that are causing it or need additional help in maturing as expected.

Please do read through our resources as you continue on your journey of self-awareness.

[AzureAndVanilla]

Note: Our pronouns are they/them, and we refer to ourselves as we/us/our.

I've noticed the word regression has been used in a negative unhealthy way. The only example I have is my daughter's therapist saying that if we don't keep up with therapy she will regress. I don't know if regression is a negative or positive thing. but according to what you're saying it's fine it's a positive thing.

Regression is used in several context. We will briefly outline those relevant to this post, and include one occasionally used within the community:

1. Regression in terms of childhood development.
2. Regression in terms of the act of a Little in expressing their Littlespace.
3. Regression therapy*. (Irrelevant to this post but potentially useful for disimbiguation purposes.)

Regression in terms of childhood development.

This refers exclusively to circumstances involving a biological child (can range from toddlerhood to early childhood) carrying out actions and expressing themselves in ways expected of children in younger development stages. Example given in the following quoted article: when a child who was believed succesfully potty trained experiencing sudden reluctancy towards potty-use.

At times, a child may even regress in her learning—that is, lose skills she has recently acquired or even take a few steps back in her learning process.

Regression sometimes signals an infection or other disorder that requires medical treatment. If medical causes have been ruled out, however, your child is probably simply responding in the only way she knows how to a recent change in her environment or some other source of stress in her life.

Common causes of regression in young children include:

• Change in the child-care routine—for example, a new sitter, or starting a child-care or preschool program
• The mother’s pregnancy or the birth of a new sibling
• A major illness on the part of the child or a family member
• A recent death
• Marital conflict or parents’ divorce
• An upcoming or recent move to a new house

Wolraich, M., MD, FAAP, 2003. Retrieved 2019-10-27 from https://www.healthychildren.org/English ... ssion.aspx

As you can see, regression in this context implies temporary lack of mental, emotional progression, jumping from a current stage into a previously lived stage of development. You want a child to progress, therefore regression in this context is a negative sign, and should definitely be addressed to get the child back on a healthy development track.


Regression in terms of Littlespace.

Regression (or Littlespace) in this context implies a relaxed state in which a Little is prone to carrying out activities, have thoughts and express feelings that fall in line with those to which correspond to that Little's little-age.

In broad terms, regression is a positive state where a fully developed adult with a Little personality further reading: How do I know if I'm a Little? is more outwards about their personal affinity with childhood.

Being a Little is a personality type. Therefore, Littlespace should be a natural activity that is sprinkled throughout a Little's life and more thoroughly manifested in states where there is comfort involved.

Littlespace [or regression] is a mindset in which an adult relaxes into a state of carefree, responsibility-free safety while expressing their atypical inner-self (personality) that differs from their biological peers.

Littlespaceonline.com. Retrieved 2019-10-27 from What is Littlespace?

Regression therapy

Uncover the spoiler to read further on this sub-topic, but bare in mind that this does not apply in any way to your post and was included for the sake of completeness.

► Read more...

Regression therapy has nothing to do with the previous two definitions given in any context. Some people in the community like to refer to it, though. So, for the sake of clarity we will include a definition.

Regression therapy is a controversial method in psychology that some therapists believes can help achieve personal resolution or closure from previous trauma experienced.

The entire goal of the therapy is to uncover and discuss trauma in pursuing personal resolution.

Regression within the community is neither a form of therapy to uncover traumatic childhood experiences nor a mental health disorder affecting consciousness. Being an age regressor is a childlike personality trait that is atypical but not a mental health concern, and centers around positive feelings and experiences instead of negative, repressed memory.

Littlespaceonline.com. Retrieved 2019-10-27 from Regression Therapy and Being Little.

I think what I'm asking about this can your inner child be a little?

We believe that most people see "inner child" as referring to a more youthful part of themselves. So, for a Little, with a Little personality, that inner child is embedded in their core, and is who they are. We suppose "inner child" could be used to explain to others how you feel. However, being a Little is who you are, and not a separate thing. It is more than just a part of you. As long as you don't refer being a Little as something different than who you are, then we suppose the question rings true.

I want to buy some onesies to wear around the house but I don't want anyone knowing about my little.

If done discreetly, onesies are just another piece of clothing. Say you wear a pair of shorts over a onesie, and nobody would think of it being something more than a tucked-in shirt. Even leotards (t-shirts with snap-crotch) are becoming more popular and sold in stores. Of course, you should treat these garments as if they were underwear, and not be ready to prance around in them freely around, unless done in private or in an acceptable environment (such as an AB/DL convention).

People generally are unaware of the community and what Littles are, so a lot of things fly under the radar.

I feel like I have to keep it a secret cuz I'm afraid people will judge me harshly and more abused juice on the way.

Being a Little shouldn't be about validation. It's about knowing who you are and doing the things that cater to who you feel you are inside. There is comfort in validation, of course, but at the same time people don't really need to know exactly what you are in order to accept who you are. The person that you are to others should align with the person you feel you are. Just be yourself, and as long as you are aware of your surroundings and what is socially acceptable in the moment, you should be fine.

Sometimes I'll talk a certain way like I'm five. I have a five-year-old so I can get away with it so part of my little can show without people knowing in some parts of my life

We would strongly advise you to not do this in front of your child though. Sure, it may seem silly and goofy to them or the people around you, but, for one, but it can hinder your child's own health and development. Your child still is learning about life, about the world around them. As their parent, they draw most of their social knowledge from you. It can be confusing to see an adult acting like a child in front of them, to them.

[kittyboo13]

*applauding this and the both of you!*

[littlespace2014]

I never thought this post would get such detailed responses thank all of you so much