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Caregivers here answer questions about being a Caregiver.
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#43581
Very good question! This is going to depend on the person on an individual basis. Being a daddy or a caretaker is a big role to fill. Ideally, the answer is yes, add would take his little and all of her hurts and he would kiss away or tears. In Japanese culture anytime a dishes broken or anything for that matter, they glue it back together using gold. If you can imagine seeing the cracks of a broken Bowl filled with lines of gold gluing it together so to speak. The idea is that the pain we go through in life molds us into New Creations and we should be proud of our scars because they have brought us to a new level of being. Not everybody feels the way I do though. And that's perfectly okay. As long as you don't settle and you never give up hope, I promise you will find the perfect one for you. Someone who will love you in spite of the pain you've gone through.
#44050
A Mommy or Daddy needs to know their baby’s past in order to help them thrive. Wether that means helping them heal from abuse or move on from bad relationships. No Little should ever hide these things from their Mommy or Daddy, however the caregiver should tell their new little one that they would really like to know about their past in order to help understand them better and that they will wait until the little one feels ready to talk to them about it. NEVER force the little one, they just put up more walls that you have to tear down later.
Cuddles, paci,bottles, stuffier go a long way with a distraught little, start there, you will see the walls come down faster........
#44278
Honestly, I tend to be attracted towards baggage. I have my own and I've learned that it's easier to go through life with someone to help you carry it. I personally ask and wait until they are ready to answer. I am pretty much an open book when it comes to my past, it's easier for me that way.
#44280
I know I'm new to this, so I am speaking not so much as an experienced CG, but as someone who has lived with the heart of one for the majority of his adult life.

I would never ask for past information about a little. They will reveal it as they feel comfortable and desire. The relationship we share should be new to us, and not include past things, good or bad. I think the only place a CG should feel the need to pry into should be things that could affect the safety of the relationship. Like whether or not the little has an ex who is vindictive and might try to harm the CG or little if they took a notion to.

Anything else should be a clean slate. Just my opinion. :)
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