Littles here answer questions about being a Little.
Note: Littles do not answer site-help questions.
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Only people identifying as Age Regressors (littles, middles, adult babies, etc.) or switches should be replying to these topics!
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#51098
 ! Message from: admin
Original Subject Title: How do *you* justify being a Little?

Azure&Vanilla have contacted admin to explain that Spanish is their first language and did not understand the word "justify" in English as thoroughly when translating their words to English. They've said that they did not mean to upset anyone and didn't understand there was any offense over using the word. They humbly extend apologies to anyone who may have been upset or hut by their use of the word, and would like to say that they are also hurt from this accident.

So, the use of "justify" in this post is simply due to an innocent language barrier because the poster does not primarily speak English.
We suggest you reword the question in your mind to something personally non-offending when replying at this point.

Please answer the actual question and not focus on the innocent misuse of one word that was accidentally used. Responses only remarking about the use of "justify" will be removed and you will receive a warning. Please be fair and kind to each other.

What can you personally say about yourself that undoubtedly makes you a Little? What differentiates you enough from being a grownup?

We will not be answering this. We want unbiased justifications.

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#51112
hihi~

First of all I don’t really think that anyone needs to “justify” being a little.
We as a community should accept others that just feel like they are little, or have an interest/participate in ddlg, or just age regress occasionally.
Anyone can be a little. Although it’s not necessarily a thing that everyone is into, we shouldn’t have to justify what makes us little in order to “officially be a little” it’s not some exclusive community or something.

But if you rephrase the question to “why do you personally feel like you are a little, or why does being a little and part of the ddlg community suit you?” Then I think my answer would be...

I’m an age player and age regressor because I enjoy the simple things in life, much like an actual child, I sometimes get into a headspace that makes me feel youthful and carefree. I enjoy childish games and love sharing a D/s dynamic with my caregiver, because it puts my mind at ease and gives me freedom. And above all, I’m a little cause it makes me happy 😊

Best Wishes <3
Lena

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#51114
Hey LittleLena! Thank you for your reply! We have opinions of our own that we wish to address personally to you but in a public fashion.

We understand that part of the community is about acceptance and understanding. Littlespace and regression are uplifting lifestyles and it is amazing to share experiences within and without the community, as well as learn from others.

There is a big difference between playing a part and being a part. As an analogy, we could use a toy aficionado versus a person that simply enjoys toys on occasion. Toys can be fun! Toys can be enjoyed by everyone! But does the simple act of playing with toys show someone’s status as a toy fanatic, of somebody who has a passion for toys outside of them being a fun activity?

The same applies for Littlespace, and really for anything that serves as an identifying pillar for an individual. A person who engages in occasional roleplay as a Little is not a Little.

It is important for the individuals in the community to understand exactly what makes them feel special, what makes them unique. Knowledge is empowerment. The more we know about ourselves and the more we know about the groups we belong to, the better information we can relegate and the better we can educate both inside and outsiders.

The community isn’t about rejecting anybody’s feelings or invalidating somebody’s identity. But at some point the line must be drawn as to what we universally consider as Little and what we do not.

That’s why it is important for one to be able to identify what genuinely and without a shadow of a doubt makes them a Little, because one’s justification aids the justification of the existence of the community itself.

If you really care about the community then you should really care about what others have to give to the community, and wish for them to contribute with their hearts and souls so that we can reach out to everybody who feels misrepresented, misunderstood, lost in a grownup world.

And it would be best if the community had a solid grasp of what makes each and every individual special and unique!

Please help us, help the community grow as one. Not everybody needs to be a Little to show support of the community. And not only Littles are allowed access to the riches and spoils of regression. But a Little is so much very special and should be harbored and protected so that they can grow and help other Littles find their way. :bye:

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#51147
My first thought when I read your post was "Why should I have to prove why it's ok for me to be a Little?

I think you are misusing the word "justification" in your post. It sounds to me like you are asking "What makes or defines you being a Little?" That being said, I'm going to answer both of those questions.

Q: How do you justify being a Little?
A: The only justification I need for being a Little is that I have the right to be whoever and whatever I want, and I don't need anybody's permission or approval to be or feel any certain way.

Q: What makes or defines you being a Little?
A: My childhood lacked adequate nurturing and appropriate discipline, and I was forced to grow up without being able to experience what childhood should have been. My adult relationships haven't been nurturing or comforting, and my responsibilities greatly outweigh them. There are times when I'm very needy and clingy; mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted; want nothing more than for someone else to take on my responsibilities, hold me in their lap and comfort me, take care of me and spoil me. There are times I want to "let my hair down" .. do child-like things (coloring, cartoons, board/video games, sing/dance, laugh and play). When I've had a bad day or something emotionally significant as happened, I just want to curl up in someone's lap and be held, rocked, petted, offered special treats (chocolate, cookies, fruit snacks, juice .. stories, movies, music, games) .. just take care of me and let me know I am wanted and loved.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/diction ... tification
justification noun
jus·​ti·​fi·​ca·​tion | \ˌjə-stə-fə-ˈkā-shən \
Definition of justification
1a : the act or an instance of justifying something : VINDICATION
arguments offered in justification of their choice
b : an acceptable reason for doing something : something that justifies an act or way of behaving
could provide no justification for his decision
2 : the act, process, or state of being justified by God (see JUSTIFY sense 2a)
3 : the process or result of justifying lines of text (see JUSTIFY sense 3a)
software that provides automatic justification of text

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#51152
@TempestBreyze;

We may have to disagree on the way you answered the first question. The word justification exists for many reasons, including to describe (quoting the second definition provided by Merrian Webster) “acceptable reason for doing something”.

Logically, being a Little means having to externalize in one way or another Little feelings and mannerisms. Therefore, those actions must have, by definition, some justification (it being that the person carrying out is indeed a Little), and by extension of that logic, acting and being a Little has justification.

Indeed, the use of the word justification implies questioning, and can come off aggressive in tone. We are not looking for people to justify their beings. We are looking for answers as to why people personally feel they have valid reasons as to why they are what they are—to translate thoughts and feelings into words, and give a glimpse into other people’s hearts and minds.

As a side argument, we would not like to propagate the idea that everything and anything could go without justification. If, as humans, we follow this line of thought “I have the right to be whoever and whatever I want, and I don't need anybody's permission or approval to be or feel any certain way”, then society as a whole loses in social norms. Society has many flaws, but one of its successes we would consider is to understand ethics in such a granular level that such a concept as “common sense” exists. That’s why institutions, systems, exist. With the basic acceptance that any person could literally do and be whatever they wish to be, but to keep the fabric of society individuals must conform to certain spoken and unspoken rules. Otherwise, any regular person (that does not have any reason to deviate from the norm) could, say, choose to be a criminal, even when that goes against the interest of the many. For no other reason than to exercise their right to do whatever they want.

So, at what point should people not need to justify what they are? Should people reserve the right to remain silent unless they break X norm that leads to Y consequence and loss of a right? Blah blah blah, this is an ethics discussion! Apologies for the deviation.

Anyway. To be more on point and add background as to why we wish to have these questions answered.

Truth by definition is the strongest truth. If we, as a lovey community of people that partake in Littlespace, are able to define what makes the community what it is by defining what it is, with concrete and immutable terms and reasons, we reach a level of strength that is not bound by any single one of the members.

The community gains value with each thought that solidified the idea that Littlespace is something that is genuinely experienced by genuine individuals, and that these feelings can be rationalized and be communicated in terms that anybody can understand. Personal accounts are very valuable because, in the end, it is the joys and experiences that the members experience that are what most matter. In the end, it will be yourself who gains from knowing who and what you are. The more tools you have in your belt to self-exploration, the higher you can transcend, in our opinion.

We must thank you for your time and discussion. We enjoy discussion very much! Fee free to deconstruct our arguments and help the community progress and grow! :eat:

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#51153
I think there is some hostility coming at the poster for using a word disagreed with in this post, and that's contributing to people not really thinking about the question. Focusing on one word isn't what we need here because it's breaking down our ability to talk about this. So can we take a step back and instead of thinking the posting is trying to do harm to each of us that they are just trying to learn? Learning is always so very good! Why don't we just share our knowledge and experiences about ourselves without thinking we're going to be attacked or hurt? This place has been safe for as long as I've been here and I don't think anybody is looking to hurt us by asking questions.

I think what the poster wants is to learn why a little feels like a little compared to people who do not feel they are littles. Like....

What makes you say at any point you were being nice to somebody else?

If you slapped a stranger in the face the moment you saw them, spat on their shoes and told them that they were ugly but then walked away and said, "I was being nice to that person," then wouldn't you expect somebody to say, "Wait, why do you think you were being...NICE?! You weren't being nice! You basically assaulted them, hurt their feelings and publicly degraded them."

Or even if the opposite situation if you met a stranger on the street and you walked away saying, "Wow, that person was really nice to me!" then why not ask yourself why you felt they were nice? They were nice for a reason.... why? Because maybe they smiled gently at you, because they shared something with you, because they held a door for you and gave you convenience, because they had a soft chat with you in an upbeat tone? Okay that's acceptable! That helped you identify that they were being nice to you right? Just breaking it down a little bit to explain it to somebody else.

So let's just think of this question as....

What helps you identify yourself as being a little?

Or even better....

When you are feeling little (in littlespace, regressed) then how do you know that's how you're feeling at the time?
(Don't think of this question as Azure&Vanilla asking you to JUSTIFY it, think of th question as them asking you to how you figured it out so that they can learn from that and maybe apply it to them)

Think of even further.... break it down as if you are teaching somebody about yourself....

Is it because you like the color pastel pink all of a sudden? Is that a signal how you know you're feeling little in that moment? Is that something typical nonregressed adults don't do or like and you feel its just a personal quirk for you? Why is the color preference change important at helping to identify how you're feeling?

"Justify" the question as being okay by thinking of this as a learning question. They just want to discover this more. They want to learn about it more. I don't think they're trying to take stabs at people.

Getting stuck on the word "justify" is really not doing anybody any favours. I don't think the poster meant harm. Let's not instantly assume everyone is trying to hurt us okay? We can talk about this and its okay!

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#51165
MommaStrange wrote:
2 months ago

So let's just think of this question as....
What helps you identify yourself as being a little?
Or even better....
When you are feeling little (in littlespace, regressed) then how do you know that's how you're feeling at the time?
I REALLY like the way this was worded. It makes more sense to me than the original poster's question. I also agree that the word "justification" has me hung up and feeling defensive.

Moving on from that .. I hope you (MommyStrange) don't mind that I borrow your question to start a new thread so that I'm not hi-jacking the original post here :bye:

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#51218
Azure&Vanilla wrote:
2 months ago
@TempestBreyze;

We may have to disagree on the way you answered the first question. The word justification exists for many reasons, including to describe (quoting the second definition provided by Merrian Webster) “acceptable reason for doing something”.
I felt the same as other posters. I think this is because it's insulting to ask someone to justify *who they are*. Justification is usually used in regards to a belief, or an action which is assumed to be based on a belief. For example, if Kayden drinks expired milk, either Kayden a) believed the milk was not yet expired, b) believed it was expired, but not that it would taste unpleasant, or c) believed he would receive some reward for drinking expired, unpleasant milk (for example a bet or dare). Any one of these beliefs *justify* Kayden's behaviour.

On the other hand, your post looked to me (and apparently others) as if you wanted us to justify our very essence. An aspect of our being itself rather than our actions or beliefs.

On another note, gatekeeping who can and can't label themselves a certain way is futile and destructive. I've seen this play out among LGBTQ+ groups, particularly on Tumblr, and it isn't pretty. Highly successful groups focus on improving the status of the ingroup among the larger society rather than squabble over "who's allowed in the club."

Sorry to get so heavy, it's just that I just found this place and don't want to see it go down that road.

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