- 1 year ago
#59908
I'm a Daddy. To start off, I want to say that I've never personally ghosted a little. But I wanted to talk about why a caregiver might.
I've babysat a number of littles, and I've been in two DD/lb relationships, one past and one current.
My first little boy, I was with him for a year. It was an LDR, and I eventually met him in person for a magical week. However, not two months later, I had broken up with him. It took me years to seek out a non-vanilla relationship after that, because I had to grow and mature enough to learn how to communicate my needs. The breakup was painful for both of us.
In this relationship, I know how to express my needs better, and it's going amazing. After spending 2.5 long-distance, we've now moved in together, and recently celebrated our 3rd anniversary. It's totally different, and I put that down to maturity, clear and reasonable expectations, and excellent communication.
Someone previously mentioned the problem of pressure, and I think that's a really important point.
Men are expected to be strong and responsible. A dominant is expected to be strong and responsible. When you have a dominant man, those pressures are doubled. It can feel like "my little one needs me. I have to man up and put myself together." And "I can't put this on them; it's not their job to take care of ME." This is stuff that goes through your head without ever asking or consulting the little. The little one, at best, thinks everything is fine while pressure builds inside the dominant. At worst, the little sees the dominant acting tense and stressed, and thinks it's their fault.
Without the skills necessary to overcome this problem, it's inevitable that the relationship will fail. No matter how the dominant handles the breakup at that point, it's going to be painful. I can see why a daddy dom in this situation, especially in an LDR, would choose to avoid the pain of a real breakup, and instead just hit the block button. It's not the mature choice, but I can see how it would happen.
If I may provide some advice... when looking for a serious relationship with a dominant, look for someone who is willing to be honest and vulnerable. To explain their limits, their needs, and their emotional state. If the guy you're talking to is only ever feeling excited, basically, he's not interested in a serious relationship. And if the person you're talking to is always "on," always in dominant mode... that's a sign that they aren't able or willing to be vulnerable with you. Everyone has hard days, you know?
Anyway, that's my two cents!