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By Sen
#50185
Hello all! So I am a relatively new Daddy (a bit over 3 months) though I have been with my little longer than that. I wanted to ask about your thoughts on punishments for littles. I feel like I lack heavily in this department. My little was being very sassy and willful today (much more than usual) and ended up saying outright that she thought she deserved a punishment towards the end of the night. I tentatively gave a small punishment (more or less just a don't do that again, no playing with yourself for the rest of the night) to which she sort of replied 'that's it~~?'. From that, I told her no playing with herself for two days and to either write a little poem or draw picture showing how she is going to be a good girl. She got rather sadly whiney after that and didn't say much before saying she was tired and wanted rest. I'm sort of at a loss :/. I genuinely enjoy her being a bit sassy/willful (which she knows very well) and hate the idea of giving out punishments. That being said, I know that she does want to be punished when she gets out of hand (purposefully so most times) and I feel like I don't have the right toolbox/skills to do so properly :/. A lot of the things I could think of (take away video games, take away computer access, etc) don't really seem viable since they're therapeutic for her (she leads a busy life and deals with a lot and I'm happy she has those outlets). A lot of the physical punishments are impossible since we are mainly long distance and see each other a few days every month and a half or so. Besides, she loves to be spanked. I have had her write a structured reflection in the past which she got upset at about at first but loved at the end, but that's really all the experience I have. I gave this punishment (no playing and drawing/writing) since she has been breaking the rule we have of no special playtime without permission a lot lately and I also just wanted her to do something fun as a punishment for the drawing/writing. I normally feel like the greatest Daddy in the world seeing as I have in my opinion the most amazing little, but I sort of feel lacking right now and just rather genuinely upset that she seemed upset when saying goodnight to each other. How do caregivers usually handle punishments? What punishments might be generally suggested? Any thoughts on the situation i presented? How do littles seem to generally react to punishment? In any case, hopefully this isn't too much of a ramble. Thank you for the time in reading and any possible responses!

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#50329
Hi there your being quite new to this is nothing to worry about it takes a long time to get used to the needs rewarding or punishing of a little certainly took me a while to work stuff out.
I also currently have a long distance little and it can be quite bothersome not being able to enforce certain things, each little is their own person and each has stuff they will/won't do and do/don't like. Perhaps work out what sort of boundary your little has in regards to punishment.
My little is quite happy to punish herself inspite of the fact I'm not there to do but will send me proof/video chat when she does it so that we both know the punishment has been carried out. I assume that when you do see each other for the short amount of time that you get that you shower her with love and affection gifts or things like that. Perhaps taking away something she expects like a favourite lolly or ice cream or colouring book when you leave/turn up will help?
Sorry it's been a week with no answer but I hope this helps you in someway.

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