- 1 year ago
#58585
I want too start this thread by saying this is the first post I've made on this site at all, and as such I'm sorry if this is inappropriate for the place that I'm posting it in. I did my best to search for the correct location, and to the best of my (admittedly limited) knowledge this is it.
I would also like to state that I have dyslexia, so I often misspell words, or otherwise struggle with sentence structure, as such I do appreciate corrections, as long as they aren't harsh or degrading.
Despite the what the title of this thread may make you think, I'm not unfamiliar with this community, I've known about it for at least seven years and I've identified as a little for four or so years, that's where the issues arise however. I'm not sure I'm actually a little, I'm not sure if the things I identified as making me a little are, in fact, a common set of identifiers to make someone a little.
I suppose I should start with what these identifiers are; I have to larger categories for these, one can me summarized as childish things I enjoy, and the other is more of a relationship dynamic. For the sack of structure I'm going to be starting with the less winded and simplistic of these two: the childish things I enjoy. To put it simply, there are a handful of things I enjoy which are often viewed as more childish, a handfull of examples are, hidden picture books, children's cartoons, and too this day I still look down the toy isle at stores and have a fairly strong desire to play with them. That all being said, I don't regress when doing these things, I'm still the same mental age I always am, they are simply things I enjoy that are childish, they don't make me regress into being more childish. For that reason I often contribute these things to my autism (I have autism) rather then being a little. I'm not sure what to make of that to be honest, I often hear about someone doing these things in regards to it helping them regress or being in a little state of mind.
The more complex of these two is the relationship dynamic I enjoy. It's worth noting that I'm not talking about sexually here, I'm submissive in that regard and I'm not exactly questioning it, this is more so about a more daily dynamic. For a somewhat comprehensive list some of the things I enjoy are as follows:
My hair being played with.
Being Doctored
Someone cooking me meals.
Someone driving me, rather then driving myself.
Having my outfits be picked out for me.
Someone making me a schedule.
Someone grooming me (doing my hair, helping me wash myself.)
Someone setting out rules for me to follow.
Someone setting me a bedtime.
Someone reading me a bedtime story.
Ect.
I feel like this list can be pretty accurately summed up as someone doing something to/for me. It's a list of things that, too the best of my knowledge, alot of littles want. That all being said, I still don't regress when these things are done to me. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy these things, I want a relationship involving them fairly badly, but I don't think I've ever been in a situation where these things have been done to me and I've regressed back to a childish state of mind. There is a caveat to that however, I've never experienced this kind of relationship IRL; I've had these things done to me IRL, which is why I realize I want this out of a relationship, and I've had a handful of very short lived online relationships, however due to the nature of these things, alot of them aren't exactly feasible online.
There's one last thing I would like to state in regards to this and that's weather or not I've ever regressed. The answer: I'm not sure. There have been times in online realtionships where I pretended to regress, or at least I think I was pretending, I'm actually unsure if I was pretending or not. I enjoyed it though, like I really enjoyed it, but I had to force myself? Does it count as regressing if you force yourself to regress or is that just pretending? And if it is just pretending why did I enjoy it? It's also worth noting that it felt wrong. I'm not sure if it felt wrong because I thought I was lying to myself or because I felt like I was lying to the person I was with. I'm really not sure. I'm just really unsure.
I would also like to state that I have dyslexia, so I often misspell words, or otherwise struggle with sentence structure, as such I do appreciate corrections, as long as they aren't harsh or degrading.
Despite the what the title of this thread may make you think, I'm not unfamiliar with this community, I've known about it for at least seven years and I've identified as a little for four or so years, that's where the issues arise however. I'm not sure I'm actually a little, I'm not sure if the things I identified as making me a little are, in fact, a common set of identifiers to make someone a little.
I suppose I should start with what these identifiers are; I have to larger categories for these, one can me summarized as childish things I enjoy, and the other is more of a relationship dynamic. For the sack of structure I'm going to be starting with the less winded and simplistic of these two: the childish things I enjoy. To put it simply, there are a handful of things I enjoy which are often viewed as more childish, a handfull of examples are, hidden picture books, children's cartoons, and too this day I still look down the toy isle at stores and have a fairly strong desire to play with them. That all being said, I don't regress when doing these things, I'm still the same mental age I always am, they are simply things I enjoy that are childish, they don't make me regress into being more childish. For that reason I often contribute these things to my autism (I have autism) rather then being a little. I'm not sure what to make of that to be honest, I often hear about someone doing these things in regards to it helping them regress or being in a little state of mind.
The more complex of these two is the relationship dynamic I enjoy. It's worth noting that I'm not talking about sexually here, I'm submissive in that regard and I'm not exactly questioning it, this is more so about a more daily dynamic. For a somewhat comprehensive list some of the things I enjoy are as follows:
My hair being played with.
Being Doctored
Someone cooking me meals.
Someone driving me, rather then driving myself.
Having my outfits be picked out for me.
Someone making me a schedule.
Someone grooming me (doing my hair, helping me wash myself.)
Someone setting out rules for me to follow.
Someone setting me a bedtime.
Someone reading me a bedtime story.
Ect.
I feel like this list can be pretty accurately summed up as someone doing something to/for me. It's a list of things that, too the best of my knowledge, alot of littles want. That all being said, I still don't regress when these things are done to me. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy these things, I want a relationship involving them fairly badly, but I don't think I've ever been in a situation where these things have been done to me and I've regressed back to a childish state of mind. There is a caveat to that however, I've never experienced this kind of relationship IRL; I've had these things done to me IRL, which is why I realize I want this out of a relationship, and I've had a handful of very short lived online relationships, however due to the nature of these things, alot of them aren't exactly feasible online.
There's one last thing I would like to state in regards to this and that's weather or not I've ever regressed. The answer: I'm not sure. There have been times in online realtionships where I pretended to regress, or at least I think I was pretending, I'm actually unsure if I was pretending or not. I enjoyed it though, like I really enjoyed it, but I had to force myself? Does it count as regressing if you force yourself to regress or is that just pretending? And if it is just pretending why did I enjoy it? It's also worth noting that it felt wrong. I'm not sure if it felt wrong because I thought I was lying to myself or because I felt like I was lying to the person I was with. I'm really not sure. I'm just really unsure.