Caregivers, Mommies, Daddies, adult babies, middles, babyfur, diaperfur, and all other Bigs and littles discuss relationship dynamics, have open group conversation, share experienced advice, and exchange ideas to help one another grow in knowledge. (Age 18 or older only permitted)
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#51273
Sometimes people talk about "fake" Daddies or "fake" littles in more ways than just general identity. Sometimes they are talking about the idea that these people are just "using" people in the community to gain something. Perhaps that means pretending to fall into the role they've taken as a label or perhaps that means pretending to have real mutual interest in their partner.

Many times we hear about "fake" Daddies using littles for sexual gratification and quick-fix intimacy moments. Often it's complained that they then "ghost" or disappear from contact with their partner.
Many times we hear about "fake" Mommies who require payment to become their little online or for short-term play sessions over the phone.
Many times we hear about "fake" littles who supposedly led on a Caregiver-type and requested many gifts, coverage for diaper expenses, high allowances, or expensive care requirements (such as high-end, custom-made items).


Do you believe this is actually a real problem within the community or do you think it's an issue few and far between, with people who unfortunately do fall into those traps simply being the loudest people on places like forums and blogs? Have you ever experienced any of these situations and, if so, did it hurt your perception of the community or question your belonging? If you feel it's a valid suggestion, do you have any ideas of how we could reduce this sort of abuse within the community? If you don't feel it's a situation that does happen then how do you feel these complaints begin and what do you think the motive(s) might be to claiming these things?

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#51280
I don't know the community well enough to say for certain (and I suspect no one does, b/c we can only know what is talked about), but it tends to be the case that problems are discussed more than good situations. This is because we want problematic situations to change. This leads to it taking up more mental space as we focus on the bad over the good (whether as a community or as an individual) and gives the false sense that problems are common.

A good example of this is how the evening news makes people afraid of society.

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#51287
Well think about this part! Like 50% or more tossing that out there! Guess but close or more* Have a mental condition of some kind! Not saying it to be mean but most have learning problems or low self esteem. There has a to be some form of damage there right lol! There is actually. I was abused as a child. tossed down stairs head first into a metal pole where a spike impaled my skull. So I had learning issues with reading and was picked on and wore diapers cause I had bladder damage from being kicked across the floor.

The point is I deal with it. I learned to coop with it move on and live with it the best I can. Most don't! Drugs tend to be a cure to fix the pains people can't coop with. Most use being a little to coop with something! It is a cooping tool of sorts for both littles and Bigs I notice have a need to care for a weaker person and want to help people! Just saying it tends to be a key trait wheatear you want to admit it or not. I been round for many years and lived a Little lifestyle for many years, I also know about 90 in person abdl community type people. I can tell you every one of them is dealing with a problem that brought them to this point. How many chartroom omg I'm going to die conversations have you seen online?

I didn't just wake up one day like being a little! took years of abuse and a way to feel cared about I lacked to make me this way. Most people find it confusing and hard to coop with cause now they don't fit the normal. They have this thing that makes them happy and weird and an outcaste all at the same time! They may be already on drugs! or used it after. Don't every person is different! Just saying mental illness is followed by drug use 50% time so why would you not expect 25% of the 50% to use drugs then in the ABDL community?

I myself don't use drugs! But I also like myself for being a little and enjoy it. I don't conform to any norm around me. If people got a problem with it I'll slap them with my wet diaper till they run like hell!

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#51293
We think that you heavily misunderstood the question, LCB. The question was regarding whether or not some Caregiver types and some Little types use those identities to have some form of gain, to take advantage over other people. You’re talking about something entirely different (which we mostly disagree with).
I didn't just wake up one day like being a little! took years of abuse and a way to feel cared about I lacked to make me this way. Most people find it confusing and hard to coop with cause now they don't fit the normal. They have this thing that makes them happy and weird and an outcaste all at the same time! They may be already on drugs! or used it after. Don't every person is different! Just saying mental illness is followed by drug use 50% time so why would you not expect 25% of the 50% to use drugs then in the ABDL community?
Are you denying that our experiences that led us to identifying as Adult Babies are not genuine. In our case in particular, we have always identified as being Babies, Little, and we can say without a shadow of a doubt that we were never abused, neglected. We had a beautiful upbringing with no sort of mental or emotional abuse, always having attentive parents, showing early signs of success, not having any mental health issues.

What you are saying is purely anecdotal and does not at all represent the community and those who have seemingly no “reason” to be Little.

If you want further discussion we advise that you make your own thread. Otherwise we should end this line of discussion right here.

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#51294
We definitely see this happening.

It does not happen in here, as far as we’ve seen, and for the most part DateCGL has been an essential tool in finding others within the community while weeding out those with ill-intentions.

As for other places, we can say that sort of behavior is prevalent.

We used to frequent Omegle. Now, the site has the reputation for being a place to connect with people quickly abd anonymously and disconnect with no strings attached. This has of course lead the user base to use this platform for quick hookups and short and very sensually heated exchanges, ending ties once the session is over.

What we found is that the majority of people on Omegle, including those that claim interest in AB/DL, CG/L, are mostly looking for hookups and quick flings.

We have also found that there are these shitty “Dommes” and “Doms” that offer to treat you like a slave or a sub or [insert any role] in exchange for a hefty price, such as an Amazon gift card or PaYPal payment. Those people are scammers, abusers, and that sort of behavior should be eliminated. They take advantage of people that are perhaps vulnerable to these con artists.

We have also had brief experiences in other CG/L sites and forums. We have found that in those there are paid people that try to funnel money out of other members’ pockets. Again, preying on others who are looking for a connection.

Overall, almost everywhere we go that has some form of dating capability or connection or something, has very poisonous actors that are up to no good, and regardless of what community they’re in, they are a problem. Especially for newer naive users who haven’t been exposed to these sorts of criminals.

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