Coming out as a little

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Passionfruits
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Coming out as a little

Postby Passionfruits » 2 weeks ago

Herro everyone :bye:
I'm looking for some advice, I've been in a relationship for a little over a year and a half. But my partner doesn't know that I'm a little. :pacy:
He has noticed some of my quirks like watching kids shows and coloring in coloring books and collecting stuffies :stuffie: But we haven't had a conversation about it. I feel like it's effecting our relationship because I haven't been able to share who I really am. But I'm so scared he won't want to be my daddy. :tears:

Have you had to come out to your partner? If so how'd you do it?



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MindyG
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Re: Coming out as a little

Postby MindyG » 2 weeks ago

I had this conversation with my husband. Basically I said...

"You know how I like Disney movies, and my stuffed animals, and little kid stuff sometimes? Well, apparently there's a name for that and I've been doing some reading and stuff and I think it fits me. It's called being a little, and it's actually from a softer, more nurturing subset of BDSM where the Dom takes on a caregiver or Daddy role and the sub is the little."

And then we talked about whether or not he was interested in learning more about it and/or participating with me. It turned out it wasn't for him, and I ended up finding a Daddy outside of my marriage, with my husband's blessing.

If your partner doesn't want to be your daddy, you'll have to decide if it's something you can live without or just do on your own, or if it's a deal breaker. If he's willing to try, start super slow. It's a lot to take on, being a caregiver, and not everyone is cut out for it

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Azure&Vanilla
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Re: Coming out as a little

Postby Azure&Vanilla » 1 week ago

Hello Passionfruits!

We hope that you have been able to find resolution to your pickle! But, if not...

We think that it is very understandable feeling in distress when you are not comfortable with sharing a part of yourself with somebody who you deem special. We do encourage you to come forward with the truth, though!

A great resource that LSO has for this situation is found here: Tips on telling friends and family about being a little or adult baby

Try to inform yourself as much as you can. You are not alone in this community. There are many like-minded people here, so you are not the only one who feels this way!

What we do suggest is that you should go in without any expectations. Your first duty is to be able to inform him enough about your Littlespace and the lifestyle so that he can make his own opinion. You can positively influence his opinion, but that comes only if you diligently find a way to express your stance.

You have to be sensitive about it and be as empathetic as you can be towards him. He has thoughts and feelings that have to be tended to, of course.

Remember: just because he is your boyfriend now does not mean he is obligated to be your daddy. Put yourself in his position. What if he told you that he wanted you to assume a position which you do not necessarily feel comfortable in? As an extreme example, what if he wanted you to be his Mommy?

It is not our suggestion to be in a polyamory relationship with a caregiver either, as that may add unfair strain on your boyfriend.

Anyway, we do hope that you can find the right words for your boyfriend, and that you and him can be happy moving along in life
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