[littlechelsea]

So after seeing multiple posts on the "looking for a little" sub form I have a question.......why do so many so called "daddys" only want "small, petite littles"? being 5'10 and very chubby this is very disheartening that I'll never be "seen" as a little by some because I am a big boned, chubby girl. Small and petite does not a little make. Littles come in all shapes, sizes and colors! Does anyone else notice this in the ddlg community?

[2018puttsl]

I agree

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[Ourheartsareone]

Since I'm married, I haven't noticed since I don't look at the personals, but I'm not surprised. That's how society is in general. Sure, some guys/gals like thick guys/gals, but for the majority of the world, there's no attraction if the woman isn't small, skinny with big boobs.

I'm bigger too, 5'9 and more than just chubby. I'm lucky that my Hubby has loved me a very long time and loved me at my smallest (which at 5'9 and big boned would never be considered "small") and my largest. I'm sorry that those seeking, at least here, aren't looking past the physical. I very much agree with you that size, or in that matter race, religion (or lack of) or age does a little make. It's all in the mindset.

I am sorry, I hope you find what you are looking for and someone can appreiciate you for who you are on the inside, not on the outside!

[divergent_vision1]

It's disheartening being a guy who is an AB so I feel your pain. It's hard getting women to talk when they're just going to assume they will just get a random lollipop pic, or horrible message. When I for one get more joy out of finding out what someone's favourite kind of ice cream is.

Just hang in there, not everyone wants the same thing. I'm sure you'll find someone special


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[MommaWren]

This does seem to be the case, but I think it extends further than just the little community. I personally think chubby littles are so adorable because they're that much more cuddly and soft as well as having a slightly rounder face always is cute as well.

I know there are daddies and mommies out there that love chubby/bigger littles but I also feel like if that's 100% unwavering as a deciding factor for the caregiver, then you probably don't want them as a caregiver anyway. I think any caregiver that is worth anything will be able to accept a little that they click with as they are and be able to see past the exterior. The reality is, everyone (even outside of the CGL community) has their stuff. No one is perfect 100% so I encourage you to still reach out to caregivers even if they put that they have a weight/height preference even if it's to find out how firmly they believe in that. Everyone has their ideal but typically they will be willing to move from that if they really get along with someone. Just like, if you would LOVE to have a caregiver with red hair but you meet one that has black hair and a great personality, are you going to turn them away because their hair is black? If the answer to that is yes, then you might want to assess how physical expectations might be hurting your chances of meeting your loving caregiver.

Speaking from personal experience, my little likes to feel strong and muscular so I encourage him to exercise and eat healthily, but I already love him the way he is and only want him to love himself the same way.

[Miss]

I'm not a Daddy Dom but I think I might be able to throw a couple of possibilities at you about it that may help.

One is that people develop their own personal preferences for certain other people throughout their entire lifetime of interacting. Basically, the idea is that who you grow up as being friends with and having positive interactions with may mold you to have an increased desire for as a partner in the future. For example, if only lean, fit men were kind to you as a child then perhaps you subconsciously seek out those types of partners. This is also why a lot of people say things like men end up marrying women like their mother's--because they grew up being cared for by primarily their mothers and subconsciously revert back to that idea (however their mother acted/treated them) as caring/loving. As time has passed Americans have grown larger in overall body-size (meaning, you're likely to be larger than your mother/your Daddy's mother since you are decades apart).

Also, and quite generally so definitely not an always, men like to feel dominant and will often seek a partner smaller than them to feel like they are physically capable of protecting. When people say things like, "Pick on someone your own size!" it's because they feel like the person who is larger can cause more damage to the other person strictly based on their size difference. The same goes for protecting someone important--body guards are usually not short, thin people, but, rather, quite tall and broad so they, at the very minimum, give off a feeling of intimidation. So, what I'm kind of saying is that being larger than your partner can be a subconscious feeling of domination too.

Then there's the meeting-needs aspect of it all. Previous littles of mine have expressed the desire to be picked up in some manner. I'm sorry if it hurts your feelings but if you're very, very heavy then most (but not all!) Caregivers are probably not going to be able to fulfill that part of your needs if it's in your list of most-desired capabilities. Sometimes if the little so very heavy it's even difficult for some Caregivers to properly hold them and still be comfortable. So, perhaps these Daddy Doms that you're seeing also desire something like that (to pick up their partner) and, thus, seek someone that can physically meet that need of theirs. I mean, personally, I want to fulfill as much as my little's needs as I possibly can, and when I'm not able to it does make me feel like I'm not a good Caregiver.

Some Caregivers want to be able to use real pull-ups on their partners. Perhaps they want to use real children's clothing to dress their little up in sometimes too. Pull-ups and brand-names like that just weren't designed to fit a large adult body.

I don't think anybody is hating on larger folks though. I don't think the Caregiver/little community is in disinterest of larger littles. If you can, I'd try not to worry too much about your body--I'm sure you're perfectly wonderful and special exactly how you are right now.

[BigPapa]

You don't need all CGs to see you as a little.
You don't need any CGs to see you as a little.
Being little is something you define for yourself.

When the right person comes around, you'll connect. Don't focus on the odds because of weight or height. You're not trying to have a relationship with all Daddy Doms. You're looking for the right ONE. It doesn't matter what most of them like. It matters what you and your CG like.

[AutumnLove80]

I can only speak for myself, here, but maybe it will shed a bit more light on the topic, as a whole. Then again, everyone is different...

For me, as a DD, there is a certain physical aspect that allows me to assume the roll...just as littles don't live 100% of the time in little space, I (and other DDs I know) don't approach everything or everyone in the world as a Daddy. Having a little who is, in fact, physically little (and by this, I mean smaller than me, as I am NOT tall) seemed to help my transition into that DD mindset.

Also, as was mentioned in previous replies to this post, my little loved for me to carry her around (a lot), and I loved being able to oblige, something that I couldn't have so easily done had she not been as small as she was (5' and 98 lbs.).

That being said, I did not love her for her diminutive size, nor was my initial attraction to her based on it (she introduced me to the DDlg lifestyle, btw)--I loved her for the person she was, and I was so ridiculously physically attracted to her because of the intimate emotional connection we developed. Had she, instead, been larger than me, I don't think it would've made any difference....I'd have still fallen head-over-heels for her, and she still would've been my darling little girl.

It is sad that so many men get caught up in what we consider to be social and cultural norms of physical attraction (especially for we men who are so entrenched in this lifestyle that's already considered a "kink"), but I also think it's slightly unfair to judge anyone based entirely on their preferences. We all like what we like, we find certain things pleasing to ourselves, while for other things we don't find pleasing at all. I'm not trying to fully compare my situation to yojrs, but in prior experience, I've had difficulty attempting to date (before I discovered I'm a DD) on occasion because I'm only 5'9" and I've heard, time and time again, "I only like taller men." And trust me, I have no problem with the idea of being with a woman who is taller than me!

As was suggested before, if you haven't found a DD yet because you believe you're too tall, too buxom, too anything...it's that you just haven't found the RIGHT DD yet.



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[Wynterpierox]

I'm a DD and personally I think looks don't fully matter personality is better wether there small medium or alittle fluffy my last little was chubby n I loved her for every aspect of her and I'd love to meet a new friend

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