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How to deal with schizophrenia/BPD in a DDlg relationship

Posted: |June 21st, 2016|, 4:21 pm
by longdistancedaddy
I recently was in a relationship with a little who suffered from mental health issues such as schizophrenia and BPD. Sometimes I felt like I couldn't be a Daddy to her as she would have extreme mood swings when suffering bad episodes. I wish I had looked for advice sooner but ultimately I don't think it would have helped our relationship.

Do any littles have any advice on how they prefer to be treated if they are suffering from bouts of depression, BPD swings, or schizophrenic thoughts? I would love to know for future reference incase the situation arises, so I can care better for my little. Thank you!

Re: How to deal with schizophrenia/BPD in a DDlg relationship

Posted: |June 22nd, 2016|, 4:51 am
by Rosetta
She is for sure having a doctor she sees about this, like a psychiatrist or psychologist. Maybe you can ask her if you can join a session to ask her doctor how you can help be there for her and what he suggests you do best during those times. If thats not possible you could also just ask her to ask her doctor and then you can both have a talk about this.
My bf suffers from depression and so it is supertough, sometimes i can do nothing but wait it out. I try to have these kind of discussions with him when i know he is on top of his life and feeling good, so i know what he'd want me to do when he feels bad. Having this talk several times on different moments can be good too, because your partner might have different ideas about it so when one doesnt work you can try the other.
Ultimately noone but her knows what its like when she lives through what she lives, and only her doctor is capable of telling whats best for support.

Re: How to deal with schizophrenia/BPD in a DDlg relationship

Posted: |July 9th, 2016|, 6:43 am
by PeppermintBatty
*sorry for kinda necroposting, but I thought this was important to talk about*

I have bipolar disorder and depression. It is extremely difficult to deal with. It is truly like a handicap and it affects every part of my waking life. I can definitely tell you about how you should treat a little like me though.
  • 1: I take medication every day. Without my medication I can often go into episodes which can leave me unable to move, extremely nervous, or even suicidal. My family knows the signs of when my personality is not functioning correctly and they remind me to take my pills every day. I am the kind of person that never takes this as offensive because they're telling me this because they love me and don't want to see me suffering.
  • 2: My daddy and my wife encourage me to see a doctor and to get health related items done. They help me not take things so seriously when I tell them I'm afraid of doctors or of getting health insurance. They also function as emergency contacts so if anything bad should happen or I receive ill treatment at a doctor's office, they can come and help fight things out with me. If necessary, they have chaperoned me as I have gone to the doctor just to make waiting in the waiting room a little more bearable.
  • 3: My family respond immediately to direct orders for help. I can send them a text message (which is sometimes all the energy I have when in an episode) asking for help and they will find me in the house and help me back to my feet or to a bed. They however do not respond to "cries for help," such as overt "acting out" sessions associated with an episode. For example, one day I got very depressed and drank half a bottle of wine. My family was attentive, but showed obvious lack of support for this behavior. Not ignoring, but they did not talk to me very much. They really just sent me to bed. Do not support unclear messages unless the situation seems extremely dire. Always tell them to ask you for help if they need it and never refuse a direct, urgent message or help.
  • 4: Do not think you have to be constantly present unless your partner needs a chaperone at all times. Your job should be to help facilitate a healthy and independent lifestyle. Do talk to your partner frequently however. At least daily. Even a text message explaining why your busy can be helpful. Practice your texting fingers during your breaks or off times. You have a responsibility to be there for your partner, but you do have to pay bills. Make sure your partner knows this and encourage them to be self sufficient and to have a large peer network. That's very important for someone like me. You need to encourage them to have a lot of friends.
That's all I can think of for now. I'll think of more soon.

Re: How to deal with schizophrenia/BPD in a DDlg relationship

Posted: |July 30th, 2016|, 5:49 am
by FishyOrange
Communication.
That's key.
Ask them what they might need because honestly we all need something different.
Generally, just be there for them. If things get too much, let them know and try to work through it cause ultimately we don't like thinking that we were too much to handle even though in the right mind we can understand how tough we are to deal with.